


Life is Both a Cruel and Kind Mistress

by CrystalClearTears



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Break Up, Cheating, Getting Together, M/M, Moving In Together, Post-Break Up, Romance, Unsympathetic Deceit | Janus Sanders, i dont usually like moxiety but this idea hit me like a train so here we, i guess?, i mean cheating on someone is a dick move so i guess so
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:34:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25549033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrystalClearTears/pseuds/CrystalClearTears
Summary: You are Virgil Grace. Your best friend is Remus Royal, he is messy and full of laughter and joy and disturbing facts. Theres a boy you like called Janus Lyke. He has two differnet coloured eyes, soft light brown hair, and a laugh to die for.You are happy.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Future Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Future Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Past Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Deciet | Janus Sanders
Comments: 2
Kudos: 29





	Life is Both a Cruel and Kind Mistress

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this in ome sitting and finished it ar one am. i cant tell you how good this will be causr i dont know. help.

You two were sitting on the floor of your room. You were wrapped in the warmth of the patchwork purple hoodie he gave you last month. You were laughing and chatting and shuffling closer inch by inch till you were mere centimetres apart. You could feel his hot breath on your lips as you stared into each other's eyes. One of his eyes is a golden honey brown, sweet and soft, while the other was darker, more of a coffee like shade that looked sharp and mesmerizing. Just as you were finally about to lean in to connect your lips as you've failed to do in this situation countless times, your mutual best friend bursts in, full of joy and ready to share some strange fact with you two. You forgot they were coming over. They stop mid-sentence and look at you two, you've pulled apart at this point, your on the bed now, which you were leaning on before, he's pushed himself against the opposite wall. There is tension in the air. 

“Am I interrupting something here?” they ask, wiggling their eyebrows suggestively.

You consider saying that yes they were, pushing them out the door and kissing the boy you've wanted to kiss for so long. You decide not to. There's always next time and you two both know how the other feels. You know that you're in love, and you know that at this point you're basically near dating him, but not quite. You don't mind. You've both got time. Neither of you mind. You decide to smile and laugh it off, telling your best friend to come in. They laugh and throw themselves onto the bed and next to you. They start rambling and you listen. Everything is good.

You and your best friend are hanging, watching movies, pointing out the dark themes and the flaws, when you feel it. The tension you've felt only ever before with that boy, Janus, is now here with your best friend. You try to ignore it. But you're so close and you feel so happy and when you look over at them, they're looking back. You have the split second thought of how nice their copper eyes are, and you realise that you are finally seeing their natural eye colour and not one of their many contacts, before you both look away quickly, moving away from each and not talking for the rest of the movie. You go home soon afterwards, anxiety seeping into your bones and nearly making you cry once you shut your front door.

It was your birthday. You and Janus were sitting on the couch in your house, watching some dumb TV show and waiting for Remus, your best friend to arrive. Ten minutes. He can feel him staring at you but you avoid him and concentrate on the TV. You know that if you lock eyes you'll move closer and closer together and you will kiss, which just a short while ago might have been an amazing thought that sent butterflies fluttering in your stomach, but now it just left you feeling uncomfortable. Not because you didn't want to, but because you know the only thing you would be able to think of would be you and Remus and how their eyes looked when you sat there and looked at each other and how their lips would have felt if you hadn't pulled away, and you couldn't do that to Janus. He didn't deserve that. Didn't deserve you. You hear a knock at the door and when you open it, they stand there, grinning and bouncing happily. You let them in. You avoid his gaze the whole night. You hope they don't notice. You know they do.

He texted you, saying that you've got to talk, and that he's coming over. Soon after, he was at your door, he looked nervous and unsure. You invite him in. You sit on opposite ends of the wooden table, and he starts talking. And talking and talking and you both confess your love and decide to date, after an entire year of pining, you think it's a great outcome. And it only took you an hour of talking. You sit on the couch and watch old movies that you mostly ignore in favour of his lips and eyes and hair and neck and every part of him you can get a hold of simply because you finally can. You don't think of copper eyes and dark hair with a streak of grey in it tonight, because you are in love and happy and that's all that matters.

He moves in a year later. Mostly out of convenience but also because you feel like this relationship will last. Remus helps you move in, helping out by dragging stuff around, and calling you names whenever you kiss him in front of them. Life is good. You don't notice how Janus seems a bit too uninterested in you.

You've been in this relationship for over two years now. He asks you to pick him up after his evening shift at the café. Even though you drop by a bookstore to pick up a book he wanted you to get, you still get there quicker than usual, there's less traffic that day. You walk up the path and see two people kissing in front of the café. You don't think much of it till you get closer and see that one of them is in the café uniform, Janus said he was the only one working, and that one has the snake tattoo on his arm, exactly were Janus has his, and they pull apart and you see that his eyes are those exact shades of brown, not honey or coffee or softness, just brown. He turns slightly and the sinking feeling in your stomach worsens, because there is the large scar on his face that is so very distinctive. 

He's smiling wider than you've seen him smile in a long time.

“Janus?” You choke out. You only realised that you were crying now. You can't stop though. Your heart lies in tatters at your feet yet it still pounded loudly in your chest.

The other man looks over, concerned but naive. Janus on the other hand looks panicked, he reaches out towards you.

“Virgil, I can explai-” He starts, but you turn around and run to your car before he can finish, driving back home.

You send him a text telling him not to come home that night. He leaves you on read.

He comes home at two pm the next day. When you open the door he looks nervous and unsure. You look tired and angry. You sit on opposite sides of the glass table he convinced you to buy. You hate it. He starts making up excuses and lying, just as he always does in awkward situations. You cut him off, tell him to just tell the truth or stop wasting your time. He unconsciously starts rubbing his finger over the crescent moon shaped scar on his face that goes from above his eye, around it, and down to his chin. You've gently touched it to calm him down so many times. You wondered if the other man ever did that. You want to burst into tears once more at the thought. He starts telling you the truth. The man’s name was Patton and they've been dating for the past ten months. Nearly half of your relationship. You want to throw up. You continue to listen. He talks about how he got tired of this relationship and fell out of love. He details how they got together. You're barely holding it together. You're shaking both from anxiety and fury. He finishes. You stand up and say one sentence.

“Pack up and get out before next week, because after that I'm changing the locks.”

No emotion or anything, you were surprised at how calm your voice sounded. Janus looked shocked, pulling away slightly, before staring at me with watery eyes.

“Really? Two years of dating and support and love down the drain because I made one small mistake?”

Classic Janus. He never knew when to back down. When to stop fighting. When to admit he was in the wrong. And that sentence had made you snap, then and there.

“One small mistake?! You cheated on me for nearly half, *half*, of our relationship, and you call that nothing!? Ten months were you picked time and time again to screw some other man while with me!? That's one mistake to you?!” You yell at him. You don't think he ever saw you yell before, because he looks so taken aback. 

You hear him mumble, “It's not some other man, his name is Patton.”

“Out!” You yell because even after this he still loves this Patton guy so much more. “Just get out!”

He's gone within a minute and you're left with a sinking feeling of loss and new-found hatred of the name Patton. You sit back down and sob into your hands. You wish this was all a bad dream.

Over the course of that week Janus comes and goes. You don't speak to him and when he moves all his stuff out, you stick true to your word and change the locks. You don't have work for the next week, you were gonna go on a road trip with that snake, so you sit at home, bundled in a bunch of blankets, crying into a pint of ice cream, watching movies, and shit talking him with Remus. At least they're still here. You feel worse than ever.

It's been two months. You still feel terrible but you have to work on commissions and you can't stay home constantly, so you take your tablet and go to Starbucks to drink coffee, work, and hope that you start feeling like a person again. You look up from your work when you feel a pair of eyes on you, and when you find the owner, you see him. Brown hair, blue eyes, concerned and naive expression. Patton. You want to throw up and cry and scream but you can't because he's walking towards you. You wish you were back home.

“Hi! I'm, um, I'm Patton, and are you, um, Virgil?” He asks, nervous and unsure, you can tell that something big is about to happen.

“Yeah, what do you want?” Your tone was needlessly aggressive, but you were too wrapped up in your emotions to tell.

“Well, um, I wanted to apologise. I, um, Janus told me everything and I'm so so so sorry that this happened, I didn't know that you two were together and, um, if I had known I wouldn't have dated him. I'm so sorry. I've been, um, well, I've been cheated on before, so I know what its like and how terrible it feels and I'm just so sorry that I caused that for you! If it makes you feel any better I dumped him as soon as I found out! So yeah, I'm just really sorry!” He talked fast, tripping over words and getting more emotional by the second.

You didn't know what you were expecting, but it certainly wasn't an apology. You thought he might gloat or yell or something, but not apologise. You weren't sure how to respond so you went for the safest option you could think of.

“Well, I want to thank you for yknow, apologising. I didn't expect you to. But well, yknow, apology accepted.” And then you added on a question that you didn't expect to, but something about the man's shimmery cool blue eyes forced you to. “Do you want to sit down, and yknow, chat or whatever?”

You bit your lip as Patton froze, and then beamed brightly “Of course!” He pulled a chair to the table.

And you talked. And talked and talked and talked until you had to go home, hours later, at which point, for some unknown reason, maybe because hes no longer some random guy who the love of your life cheated on you with but Patton, who likes to journal, and gardening, and photography and thinks your art is amazing and compliments you constantly, you asked him if he'd like to come over and stay the night at yours, just to talk and hang out, with both you and your best friend. He said yes, his eyes held this pure form of excitement that made your stomach flip.

And as you sat there on the couch in your apartment with the two of them, your best friend and the boy that you used to despise so much, arguing over Disney movies and what's the best food on the planet, you thought that maybe, just maybe, in a year or two, these two might fill the hole left in your bed by that snake.

One day.


End file.
